The Girl is gone this weekend, having traveled to the West Coast for a weekend work trip. Usually, when The Girl goes out of town, I spend a lot of time cooped up in the house. We are homebodies together, when I’m alone I’m even more of one. And this weekend has had its share of that, for sure. But yesterday I left work early, bought a new phone, rented some movies, and went out to dinner with friends before retreating to the comfort of home, and I’d also gotten it into my head that I wanted to treat myself to a really nice dinner tonight (Saturday), as well.

Both The Girl and I can be real food snobs sometimes, and for me, tonight was no exception. Dean & Deluca is a really trendy, really high quality, really very expensive grocery store in Georgetown. I made the trip in to the city tonight in early evening to do some shopping for dinner, and breakfast and lunch tomorrow, which included some bleu cheese burgers, topped with prosciutto and pears, and some tomato, basil, and mozarrella and orzo pasta for dinner, while I watched basketball. Tomorrow, it’s fresh fruit and the remainder of the prosciutto for breakfast, and another burger for lunch (I told you I was a food snob).

The question is, when The Girl returns, will she be A) upset at me for spending so much money on so little food, or B) upset that I did so when she was out of town, or C) simply upset that I even thought about going to Georgetown without her? Guess we’ll find out tomorrow.

Last week, I set out to write about how easy it’s been to quit smoking, and how easy a time both myself and The Girl have seemed to have of it.  I took a couple of days, like I always do, to turn the post over in my head a little bit, and to get my thoughts on the subject collected. And then I took a couple more days, like I always do, putting it off, because I didn’t have time to write.

 And then a funny thing happened. After having to stay past midnight at my office, and spending the night critically thinking much later than I’m normally used to, and filling my body with fatty foods, and sugary soda, I had a huge craving for a cigarette on my ride home. It was gone as quickly as it came, and of course I was fine, but it served as a reminder to me that for some people, and The Girl and I are included in this list, the battle with smoking is never really over.

 My last scheduled day of using the patch is Sunday, and after that she and I are on our own. For that reason, even though our fight with this will continue on, this will probably be my last post on the subject. Ironically, my one disappointment in writing this series of posts is that I haven’t had more of a difficult time. Aside from my first post on the topic, there hasn’t been anything of note to discuss. As appreciative as I am of the comments of support from friends and family, I really hoped to have more insight to share into the matter, with the hopes that someone else trying to quit smoking may be able to glean some bit of helpful advice from my experiences.

I suppose though, that such a catch-22 is inherent in the entire process. Someone who has just quit smoking for the first time probably doesn’t have enough insight into what made their effort successful, so as to help others, and someone who has quit smoking multiple times probably isn’t giving out the best advice. With that said, I consider this topic having run it’s course, for now.

 On to bigger and better things.

The Girl and I just returned from our nine day vacation with her family, and we had a wonderful time. Some of the views, and the activities, will be remembered for a long time to come. I just got the entire set of pictures onto Flickr, but you can see one of the better ones below, a view of our ship, from the beach on Labadee, Haiti.

The urge to smoke while on vacation was almost non-existent. As a matter of fact, I completely forgot to put on a nicotine patch a couple of days. Add that to the fact that cigarettes were, for the most part, completely unavailable, and the week was pretty smooth sailing, on that front. It also didn’t hurt that food was always available.

Hopefully I’ll have time to expound on our wonderful vacation in the next few days.

In the interest of full disclosure, I really don’t feel like I’ve had it too bad over the past weak. That’s not to say that I haven’t had a few cravings here and there, but they’ve been fairly week, and quick to pass. I almost feel guilty, because The Girl seems to be having a much harder go of things, but I try my best to keep reminding her that I still have nicotine coursing through my veins via a little clear patch on my arm, whereas her body is basically going without for the first time in quite a few years.

Last night, I had what I would call my first big test. We went to some friends’ house for a Super Bowl party, and I had a few beers while eating. Drinking and smoking normally went hand in hand for me in the past, literally, but I didn’t have those same urges last night, and I left the party feeling a bit proud.

Which is not to say that things have necessarily been easy. The cravings might not be there en masse, but that habits are still making it hard to stop thinking about smoking. I’m still rolling my windows down for no reason as I drive, or getting up at work for a break, only to realize, I have no reason to do either. I still want to smoke after meals, especially dinner, mostly out of boredom, and sense of schedule.

A couple of other problems have shown themselves as well. Neither she or I has gotten a good night’s sleep over the past few weeks. This is a known symptom of nicotine withdrawal, but I’m surprised at the significance of it. Additionally, my mind hasn’t been that sharp, and my head hasn’t been that clear, since we quit. I suppose that could be expected, but once again, I felt like these were issues that might have affected me for one or two days, but not for as long as they have.

And I think that’s where the fears that she and I have about this whole process are coming from right now. I think a lot of the time the same thought runs through our heads’ when we’re crabby, or upset. ‘Is this a symptom of withdrawal, or is this what we’re always going to be like if we don’t smoke?’ Obviously, the latter isn’t likely, but it’s not altogether impossible either. So I think we’re both just trudging through the present at the moment, hoping that the future brings some sort of symbolic light at the end of the tunnel. We’ll be leaving on Saturday to go on a cruise with her family, and I think that might be the kind of help we need to push through these middle weeks, and boy do we need some sort of change of pace right now. Maybe The Girl wasn’t so crazy after all when she chose this time for us to quit.